The Thirteenth Submissions

Thirteen is a lucky number around here when Flannery kicks things off...

"The Joy Luck Fight Club"

(The first rule, about "The Joy Luck Fight Club," is that you don't talk to mom, about "The Joy Luck Fight Club." An automatic Hall of Fame lock. Ed)

"Bang The Tin Drum Slowly"

"The Unsinkable Jackie Brown"

"Galaxy Quest for Camelot"

"High Road to Chinatown"

"Breakfast Club At Tiffany's"

"The Incredible Shrinking Hulk Woman"

"I Never Promised You a Secret Rose Garden"

"Romy & Michelle's Rock and Roll High School Reunion"

"Red Dawn of the Dead"

Chris has yet another excellent set

"Better Kiss Me Off Deadly"

"The Wizard Of Osmosis Jones"

"The Singing Detective In The Rain"

"A Hard Day's Night Of The Living Dead"

"Beyond The Seabiscuit"

(Willll-bur, go sail-ing. Ed)

"Any Which Way But Bustin' Loose"

"Permanent Midnight Express"

"Fantastic Four Seasons"

"The Picture Perfect Storm"

Rust never sleeps, Neil Young, and Flannery sleeps even less than that...

"Wild Groundhogs Day"

"Hellraiser III: Motel Hell on Earth"

"Star 80 Wars: Episode III: Porky's Revenge of the Sith"

"Mr. Destiny Turns on the Radio"

"Dr. T and What the Women Want"

"The Sixth Sense and Sensibility"

"Road Trip to Bountiful"

"Kiss Me Goodbye, Mr. Chips"

"She's All That Jazz"

"Secondhand Lions in Winter"

The Twelveth Submissions

Flannery has become just downright intimidating...

"Remember the Clash of the Titans"

"Heaven Can Wait Until Dark"

"Lady Jane and the Tramp"

"Beat the Devil in a Blue Dress"

"Eraser Head of State"

"Some Close Encounters of the Third Kind of Wonderful"

"The Sure Thing About Love"

"Home Alone for the Holidays"

"The Bad Broadcast News Bears"

"The Muppets Take the Manhattan Project"

While the titles of the Ed come to a close...

"Full Contact Croupier"

Julianne Moore goes to Hong Kong in "The End of The Infernal Affairs."

The Eleventh Submissions

The Ed guy reaches into his DVD collection to counter the relentless Midwest onslaught...

"When Harry Met The Usual Suspects"

One of my crime faves + my favorite Paul Giamatti film = "Romeo Is Bleeding Sideways"

A new fave + a DMX fave = "The Departed Never Die Alone"

My most treasured DVD + a Jerry Lewis film that I'd never buy = "GoodCinderFella"

"The Bourne Elf Identity"

"True Underworld Romance"

"To Have and Have Not Layer Cake"

A Michael Mann film + another DMX film = "Collateral Belly"

"Little Big Men In Black"

I said it before and I'll say it again, you can not stop Flannery, you can only hope to contain her...

"Wet Hot American Summer of Sam"

"The Remains of the Day the Earth Stood Still"
(Nice, Clarice! Ed)

"Cheaper by the Dirty Dozen"

"Kelly's Last Action Hero"

"Not Without My Coal Miner's Daughter"

"Heartbreak Ridge Hotel"

"Howard's End of Days"

"Bad Medicine Man"

"Bachelor Party Girl"

"Warlock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels"

Chris offers up a masterful set...

"Good Willow Hunting"

"Catch Me If You Can't Hardly Wait"

"Fun With Dick Tracy And Calamity Jane"

"Something's Gotta Give My Regards To Broad Street"

"Syrianastasia"

"Ladder 49 Up (49 Up is a documentary)"

"Snakes On Planes, Trains, & Automobiles"

The Tenth Submissions

The Goddess Flannery gives forth from her cornucopia...

"Honey, I Blew Up The Karate Kid"

"Rumble Fish In the Bronx"

"The Rush Hours"

"Enter the Dragon Slayer"

"The Da Vinci Code of Silence"

"Highlander: End Crying Game"

"Death Wish of a Salesman"

While Chris brings this down from Mt. Olympus

"The Perils Of Gwendoline In The Land Before Time Of Yik Yak"

(That's "The Perils of Gwendoline in The Land of The Yik Yak" + "The Land Before Time," folks. Chris always stumps yours truly at least once every submission and it's time to hit the IMDB. Ed).

"Saving Ryan's Private Parts"

"Baraka-ligula"

"Harold & Kumar Go To White Chick's Castle"

"The Third Quiet Elephant Man"

"My Big Fat Zorba The Greek's Wedding"

"A Fish Called Hotel Rwanda"

"Fools Rush Indiana Jones And The Last Crusade"

"Man Of The House Of Sand And Fog"

"One Stir Crazy Summer"

"Brian's Song Of The South"

"Five Easy Pieces Of April"

(Wow, where would Jack Nicholson's character want Katie Holmes to hold the turkey??? Ed)

"The Notting Hills Have Eyes"

The Ninth Submissions

Yes, the William Tell Overture is Flannery's theme song

"The Cinderella Man with One Red Shoe"

"Big Momma's Animal House"

"Super Starship Troopers"

"Sin City Slickers"

"Fistfull of a Few Dollars More"

"The Dead Devil Men Don't Wear Plaid Prada (It's a stretch, I know)"

"Midnight Polar Express"

"Big Chill Daddy"

"The Meaning of the Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean"

"Working Girl, Interrupted"

While Chris cranks the Wagner and descends on us with...

"Biloxi Blues Brothers"

"McCabe & Mrs. Miller's Crossing"

"Endless Summer Rental"

"The Naked Guns Of Navarone"

"A Mystic River Runs Through It"

"The Devil And Daniel Webster Wear Prada (sorry, Flannery)"

"My Left Footloose"

That Ed guy chimes in with a few

"Bad Day At Picnic Hanging Rock"

"Dirty Harry And The Hendersons"

"The Wicker Man Friday"

"High School High Plains Drifter"

"The Outlaw Josey Whales of August"

"The Gypsy Mothman Prophesies"

(Hella weak! Ed)

Save us Chris, save us from that Ed guy

"The Squid And The Whale Rider"

"National Lampoon's Velvet Vacation"

(Nice! Ed)

"Breakin' 2: Electric Horseman Boogaloo"

"Bronco Billy Madison"

"Places In The Braveheart"

"Anatomy Of A Murderball"

The Eighth Submissions

Flannery is prone to proficency...

"Gone With The Mighty Wind In Sixty Seconds"

"Taking Care Of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane"

"The Adventures of Priscilla, African Queen of the Desert"

"Quigley Down Under The Tuscan Sun"

"It Happened One Night At The Opera"

(One would think that someone would've came up with this game and this phrase way back in the 30's. Bravo, Flannery! Ed)

"Midnight Cannonball Run, Lolita, Run"

"Enemy of the Garden State"

"She's Having A Cry Baby"

"Runaway Corpse Bride"

Chris is not just some guy, see, chow mein?

"Throw Momma From The Trainspotting"

"Who Framed Roger & Me's Rabbit?"

"Boyz N The Parenthood"

"The Adventures In Babysitting Buckaroo Bonzai"

"Strange Brewster's Millions"

"Full Metal Jackass"

(Ha-hah! Ed)

"Innerspaceballs"

My head is box full of X Dell, and that's the way I like it...

"The Meaning of Life Stinks (Monty Python and Mel Brooks independently come to a dismal revelation)"

"John Tucker Must Die Another Day (Procrastinating cheerleaders wait for 007 to kill off their two-timing boyfriend.)"

"A Jesus Christ Superstar Is Born (The Messiah seeks fame and fortune in Hollywood.)"

"Ed Woodstock (The famed schlock director films a 1960s rock festival.)"

"Pretty in Pink Flamingos (Divine gives fashion tips to Molly Ringwald.)"

"Zorro, the Gay Bladerunner (George Hamilton stars as a swashbuckling android with alternative programming.)"

(On the Phillip K. Dick tangent, do tanning booths dream about George Hamilton? Ed)

"Kiss, Kiss Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (A thief, an actress, and a private eye purchase a flying car that drives itself.)"

"Everything You Wanted to Know about Casual Sex? But Were Afraid to Ask? (Lea Thompson and Victoria Jackson star in this Woody Allen comedy.)"

"I Am Curious Yellow Submarine (Private Gripweed hears voices from the unidentified submerged object that he spots on radar.)"

"The Trouble with Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (John Forsythe and Shirley MacLaine critique the first movie about the boy wizard.)"

Yet, in the same day again, Flannery posits...

"Thirteen Days, Twelve Angry Men"

"The Last Tango & Cash in Paris"

"Cutthroat Island of Dr. Moreau"

"The Color of Purple Money"

"Mean Calendar Girls"

"Apocalypto Now"

"Raging Bullwinkle"

(Automatic All-Top Ten nominee. Ed)

"The Never Ending Love Story"

"The Same Time Machine Next Year"

"Ordinary People Under the Stairs"

The Seventh Submissions

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

"Ah Yes, Something New Has Been Added!"

I've added an addendum to the rules, Ansel Adams, to clear the picture up a little.

I try to police it and it would be a big help if you could pitch in as well. If you can, before posting your submission, please type in the keywords of your titles, and click "Search Blog" to make sure that your combination is not redundant. Keep America and this blog, beautiful.

The Sixth Submissions

Annnddd they're off!

He sure is Sporting some Big Shoulders...

"Flags of Our Fathers of the Bride of Chucky"

"The 40-Year Old Virgin Suicide Kings"

"In the Army of Darkness Now"

"Waiting for Guffman to Exhale"

"Black Hawk Down By Law"

"Falling Down from the Mountain"

"The Last Samurai Waltz"

"I Am Trying to Break Your Heart, Huckabees"

Chris wanders into Errol Morris territory and says "I'm a big documentary fan, so here's a few more obscure ones"

"Fast, Cheap, & Out Of Control Room"

"Sherman's March Of The Penguins"

"Paradise Lost Boys Of Sudan"

"The Fog Of War Room"

"Wheel Of Time Indefinite"

The Life of Flannery Alden is intense, as she says "Chris, I love: Wheel of Time Indefinite! Here's mine"

"The History of Wayne's World, Part I"

"That Funny Thing You Do Happened To Me On The Way To The Forum"

"The Fast Food and the Furious Nation"

"Hellboys Don't Cry"

"Rocky 1984"

"Super Quiet Man"

"Under The Cherry Moon Over Parador"

"Hot Shots In The Dark"

"Repo Man of the Year"

Chris comes back with in the same day

"Beyond The Harper Valley Of The Dolls, P.T.A."

"It's A Wonderful Life Of Brian"

"Nanook Of The North Dallas Forty"

"The Cider House Rules Of Engagement"

"Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid Stays In The Picture"

"Police Academy 4: Citizen Kane On Patrol"

"Prince Of Crimson Tides"

X Dell dips back in the well and sez, "okay, I've checked with blog search, but was unable to find the following titles and descriptions..."

"Help! Psycho! (The Beatles check into the Bates Motel.)"

"Fahrenheit 9/11:14 (The Bush family’s Saudi connections are examined from five different points of view.)"
(Wow, someone else in this country actually saw "11:14?" Unbelievable! Ed.)

"The Third Mandingo (A slave impregnates his master’s wife, and then flees to Vienna, where Orson Welles has promised him a job.)"

"Jaws-II, The Birds-10 (Manager Bo Derek leads her baseball team to an unlikely upset in Alfred Hitchcock’s only sports movie.)"

"Poltergeist II, Jaws III (Score of the consolation game.)"

"Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace II Society(Street hustlers attack the Jedi.)"

"Forbidden Planet of the Apes (Leslie Nielsen clashes with Roddy McDowall as they each try to figure out which one of them is in the wrong movie.)"

"Cotton Comes to Harlem...Nights...After Hours (Eddie Murphy, Griffin Dunne, Rosanna Arquette and Richard Pryor track down a shipment of aspirin bottle linings stolen by Redd Foxx.)"

"Shampoo Network (Paddy Chayefsky drama about a very specialized cable station. Starring Warren Beatty, Julie Christie, Faye Dunaway, and Peter Finch as a hairdresser who is mad as hell, and can’t take this anymore)"

"West Side Story of O (In order to join her brother’s street gang, Natalie Wood must submit to a sexually humiliating initiation.)"

A Prayer For John Donald Carlucci

A pox on Yahoo and a pox on blog-city. I have just received an email some three days after it was intended, John Donald Carlucci has pancreatitis. If you go to here, his sister posted the general information in the "comments section."

Please take the time to say a prayer for him and try to post a get well, though I don't know how strong his comment moderation is.

Thank you

P.S. An update from John's sister Leslie via John's blog:

John was moved from ICU late this afternoon. He will be in the hospital for at least another couple of days. At this point we are just waiting on test to come back. His color looks good and he was awake and talking for awhile today. He is not aloud any food or drink. That of course is making him very unpleasant. They said this occurred because of extremely high cholesterol and he is diabetic. We are waiting to hear if the diabetes is primary or secondary. He had an MRI today and should know tomorrow if he is going to require surgery. Friday he was in critical condition. The doctor said we almost lost him. That is very, very scary..... he's a pain in the ass, but I love him. Thanks for any prayers. Leslie

The Fifth Submissions

I have been refraining from commenting for the most part. Because I am enjoying this immensely and I think that all of the submissions stand very well all on their own. So much so, that I don't want to step on them with third-rate puns. So please don't misinterpret my general lack of commentary as indifference. Ed

The Pop Eye really kicks things off with...

"My Big Fat Greek Wedding Crashers"

"I'm Dirty Dancing as Fast as I Can"

"Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventures in Babysitting"

"Ferris Bueller's Day Off the Chain"

"The Pretty in Pink Panther"

"Breakfast at Tiffany's Club"

"In The Line of St. Elmo's Fire"

"Better Off Drop Dead Gorgeous"

"Night of the Living Dead Poets Society"

"Can't Buy Me The Love Bug"

"Rain Man of La Mancha"

X Dell accelerates with

"How Stella Got Her Groove Back to the Future"

"Gone with the Wind that Shakes the Barley"

"A Hard Day's Night Shift"

"The Sound of Music, Man"

"The Distinguished Gentleman Prefers Blondes. (Okay, so I fudged that one a little.)"

"The Lost Weekend at Bernie's"

"A Man Called Horsefeathers"

"Orgy of the Dead Man Walking (Starring Susan Sarandon, and directed by Ed Wood)"

"The Spy Who Loved Me, Myself & Irene"

"The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Games"

Shakespeare said "out damn spot." Not "out Dead Spot on the Web"

"The Remains of the Day of the Dead"

"The Lost World: Gosford Park 2"

"The Repo Man Who Knew Too Much"

"The Blue Velveteen Rabbit"

I keep coming up with ones that aren't quite right, like "The Great White North By Northwest" or "Das Boots Were Made For Waking"

(Sorry, the last half is not a film, you have to highlight it with a mouse to see it. Ed)

The Uneffenbelivable Mish Mash that is Amy said via email...

"Harold and Maude go to White Palace (Harold and Maude + Harold and Kumar go to White Castle + White Palace)"(Heh-heh-heh! Ed)

"Life as a Road House (Life as a House + Road House)"

"The People Under the Stairs vs Larry Flynt (The People Under the Stairs + The People vs Larry Flynt)"

We cannot stop Flannery, we can only hope to contain her...

"Moonstruck Mermaids"

"Sunset Striptease"

"Singin' in the Purple Rain"

"Mad Max Dugan Returns"
(Literally as I am editing this, "Max Dugan" is on AMC! Ed)

"Strangers on a Night Train to Paris"

"Dead Body Heat"

"Howard the Duck Soup"

"Nine to Five Easy Pieces"

"Come Back to the Slaughterhouse Five and Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean"

"Mother, Juggs & Speed 2: Cruise Control"

The Fourth Submissions

Chris contemplates...

"The Forty Year Old Virgin Suicides"

"(This one's a stretch) The Bridge On The River Kwai The Beloved Country"

"Thirteen Days'd & Confused"

"A Bridge Too Far And Away"

"Star 80 Wars"
(Ooooh, nice one George Lucas Bogdonavich! Ed)

"Fast Times At Ridgemont High Plains Drifter"

"Apocalyspe Now And Then"

The Pop Eye preaches

"Mad City of Angels."

And..."Tommy Boy in the Plastic Bubble."

I guess I should quit with the Travolta flicks though. Should I move on to Will Ferrell?

"About Last Night at the Roxbury"

"Old School of Rock"

"Zorro, The Gay Blades of Glory"

"The Madness of Curious King George"
(That works on sooo many levels. Ed)

Coaster Punchman brings a bit of his world with...

"Girls Just Wanda Whip Wall Street"

The Pop Eye jumps back in with

"Over The Top Hedge" - Animated. A squirrel named Sly has to arm wrestle an evil, white-trash groundhog. And then Sammy Hagar sings about it...probably with Randy Newman.

Flannery elevates the game with

"Crossroads to Wellville"

"The Scarlet Love Letter"

"Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead Again"

"Bring it on the Waterfront"

"Die Hard with a Vengeance Another Day"

"Dirty Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban"

"Mystic Pizza Deliverance"

"Jumpin' Jack Flashdance"

"Room with a View to a Kill"

The Third Submissions

The Pop Eye, ever watchful, says...

"Jacob's Ladder 49"

"Battlefield Earth Girls are Easy"
(Note, this is my fave, as well as L. Ron's. Ed)

"Snow White Man's Burden"

"Two of a Kind if By Sea"

The Best Friend a Procrastinator can have, Katie sez

"The Bride of Frankenstein" + "The Green Slime" = "The Green Slime Bride of Frankenstein"

X Dell fires from the hip...

Hmm I can think of:

(1) "Wag the Dog Day Afternoon."

(2) "Anatomy of a Murder at 1600."

(3) "To Live and Die in L.A. Story."

(4) "Eight Men Out There."

Taking Katie's tack, I can come up with "Rocky Horror Picture Show" + "The Last Picture Show" = "The Last Rocky Horror Picture Show."

Whoa, there's someone new to the mix and the Procrastinating blogs, Flannery. Who is Prone to Whimsy...

"Mr. and Mrs. Smith Go To Washington"

"My Own Private Benjamin"

"The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood's Travelling Pants"
(Note folks, this is a logical progression as I've read a review that stated that they were basically the same film. Ed)

"Stomp the Longest Yard"

The Second Submissions

Becka said...

I was gonna suggest "Death Blow Out," and then I realized that "Death Blow" wasn't a real movie."Aw man, we're missing the Death Blow!"

So I replied...

Um,"Blow Out" + "Death Race 2000" = "Death Blow Out?"

Haahnster said "go Bears" and...

"Girl Fight" + "Fight Club" = "Girl Fight Club"

"Roger & Me" + "You, Me & Dupree" = "You, Me & Roger Dupree"